#1
Here are your likely options:

Jill Stein (Green Party)
PROS: Too Jew to Fail; cares about Gaia; actually on the ballot.
CONS: Not Marxist and constantly erases class.

Gloria La Riva (Pissle, Piss and Freedom Party)
PROS: Marxist-Leninist; $20 minimum wage; 'Christmas List to Santa' of other socio-economic rights.
CONS: Crypto-Trotskyite; wants to make a job a right (taking away key posting hours).

Mimi Soltysik (Socialist Party USA)
PROS: Democratic socialist... The word democratic makes it better.
CONS: Not actually on ballot yet; revisionist.

Monica Moorehead (Workers World Party)
PROS: Marxist-Leninist; Crypto-Trotskyite.
CONS: Not actually on ballot yet; there is no actual planet named Workers.

Chairman Bob Avakian (Revolutionary Communist Party USA)
PROS: Developed the New Synthesis; people's war advocate.
CONS: Does not participate in bourgeois elections.

David Grabber (Anarchy Dad)
PROS: King of Occupy Wall Street.
CONS: Occupy Wall Street doesn't exist anymore.... or does it?
#2
Voting?!? Mods?!?
#3
Donald Trump
#4
frontpage, along with all the other stuff that should have been frontpaged
#5
yeah i know people are busy but i am asking for frontpages for my people, projectiles for power, and solar energy for my goddamn lightbulbs to be bright...

also, write in nofreewill (i still vote trump to hasten human extinction if he's a candidate, if not i write him in)

PROS:
none
CONS:
ex
#6
i will probably tell my homies to vote Stein cause of bere and goats
#7
also Sanders is gonna win and then betray all his "principles"
#8
vote PSL or WWP imo
#9

Flappo posted:

Donald Trump

#10
wait, hows the pissle candidate a crypto-trot? i thought they supported cuba and the memory of the glorious soviet union
#11
we do. its pretty common for sectarian MLs to call us trots cuz WWP split from SWP in the 50s. its lulzy but i dont think hes being serious
#12
yeah i always thought it was more common to accuse em of being tankies.

btw whats the best way to join the PSL in SF urbandale? show up in fatigues and sidle up to members asking if theyre into doing what has to be done, say hey im not a cop and id have to tell you if i was one, and if they want to see my garage full of bombs?
#13
[account deactivated]
#14
it's spelt kony
#15

Urbandale posted:

we do. its pretty common for sectarian MLs to call us trots cuz WWP split from SWP in the 50s. its lulzy but i dont think hes being serious

"The Soviet Union is a contradictory phenomenon. It is a revolutionary social system with a counterrevolutionary leadership. Comrade Cannon expounds on the concentration camps, frame-ups, etc. What he says is true. But this truth alone is insufficient.

There was a time when we were practically the only group in the labor movement consistently explaining this truth from the revolutionary point of view. But today the bourgeoisie has seized upon this aspect of the Soviet state and broadcast it to the four corners of the earth. Today this is practically all the American worker hears. It is drummed into his ears day in and day out by the tremendous capitalist apparatus of radio, television, the press and the pulpit. He identifies the reactionary aspect of the Soviet Union with the entire social system, just as the capitalist class wants him to do. Hence, it is ail the more obligatory to emphasize the other side of the Soviet Union, its class character, its new social system. It is necessary to explain that it is a living, viable workers' state, an historic gain of the working class, a conquest to be defended."
- Sam Marcy (founder of the WWP)

The ideological line of the WWP (and PSL) is Trotskyist - they call for worker revolutions in degenerated workers states, but think their primary work is in defending the social basis of these countries against the imperialist core. The leadership stopped using the Trotskyist language in the 1980s/1990s and just argues for those positions because they don't want to alienate people who come to the party from other traditions. And because it makes working with other parties easier. (For example, if you defend China and then call yourself a Trotskyist then China wants nothing to do with you.)

#16
Well, frankly I'm more concerned about my own nations electoral travails. Thank god that we have democracy - some people aren't ready for it!

Candidate: Butch Hangman
Pros: strong history of wrestling, good teeth
Cons: adopted a dark skinned son.

Candidate: Stetson dargle
Pros: descended from convicts
Cons: insatiable desire to consume fibre optic cables, completely undermining his platform on expanding the nations broadband network

Candidate: Ursula Corkbobble
Pros: capable of emitting a protracted wail that can deradicalise youngsters in seconds
Cons: presently guarding our island home from her guard tower in Cairns

Candidate: Ragnar Helmbet
Pros: Powerful as an ogre, doesn't apologise for his strong stance on aborigines and shark culls
Cons: imprisoned for slaying hundreds of ants
#17
I think it's possible that the PSUV will 'lose' the Venezuelan parliamentary elections.
#18
Also please note that I do not find it shameful that the PSL believes the Soviet Union degenerated under the leadership of Stalin and that the proper response should have been insurgent worker's democracy. That seems reasonable to me.
#19
[account deactivated]
#20

getfiscal posted:

The ideological line of the WWP (and PSL) is Trotskyist - they call for worker revolutions in degenerated workers states, but think their primary work is in defending the social basis of these countries against the imperialist core. The leadership stopped using the Trotskyist language in the 1980s/1990s and just argues for those positions because they don't want to alienate people who come to the party from other traditions. And because it makes working with other parties easier. (For example, if you defend China and then call yourself a Trotskyist then China wants nothing to do with you.)



do you have anything from actual PSL sources? because they seem to differ a lot from that WWP trot line these days. http://liberationschool.org/what-is-the-real-legacy-of-the-soviet-union-an-overview/
http://liberationschool.org/10-11-30-why-we-continue-to-defend-soviet-html/

#21

aerdil posted:

yeah i always thought it was more common to accuse em of being tankies.

btw whats the best way to join the PSL in SF urbandale? show up in fatigues and sidle up to members asking if theyre into doing what has to be done, say hey im not a cop and id have to tell you if i was one, and if they want to see my garage full of bombs?



call the local office, say youre interested in joining the party. alternately go to a public meeting and tell them there. you can also apply online, but phone+in-person are much faster because it doesnt have to route through national first

#22
both WWP and PSL have moved somewhat-comfortably away from marcy while still acknowledging his role in forming the party (we still talk about global class war, for example). there are people inside the party that are closer to these positions, but the majority of the rank + file id describe as largely ML with some maoists

Edited by Urbandale ()

#23

Urbandale posted:

both WWP and PSL have moved somewhat-comfortably away from marcy while still acknowledging his role in forming the party (we still talk about global class war, for example). there are people inside the party that are closer to these positions (becker, la riva) but theyre old. the majority of the rank + file id describe as largely ML with some maoists

Sure, sure.

#24

getfiscal posted:

Urbandale posted:

both WWP and PSL have moved somewhat-comfortably away from marcy while still acknowledging his role in forming the party (we still talk about global class war, for example). there are people inside the party that are closer to these positions (becker, la riva) but theyre old. the majority of the rank + file id describe as largely ML with some maoists

Sure, sure.



*shuffles through a mass of carbon paper* Uh yeah, can confirm.

#25
Martin O'Malley got off some pretty sick burns on an old woman last Saturday if that's what you're into
#26
http://www.buzzfeed.com/ilanbenmeir/santorum-it-sounds-like-president-obama-is-in-cahoots-with-t

It sounds like president Obama is in cahoots with the strategy of ISIS to maintain their territorial integrity.

#27
Saying that two people or groups are 'in cahoots' should be an automatic disqualifying statement for the office of the presidency
#28

FSAD posted:

Saying that two people or groups are 'in cahoots' should be an automatic disqualifying statement for the office of the presidency

bush junior used a lot of aw-shucks folksy wisdom and he turned out alright

#29
[account deactivated]
#30

FSAD posted:

Saying that two people or groups are 'in cahoots' should be an automatic disqualifying statement for the office of the presidency

hmm, you're right. We'll add this one to the permanent record of the guy they named bloody cum poop after so we don't elect him by mistake.

#31
how can any of them inspire me when they don't thinspire me?
#32


In New Hampshire today, a man calling himself Vermin Supreme filed for the presidential primary. He said in his administration, every American will receive a pony. He also plans to defeat ISIS by going back in time.
#33
Dug up this old account to post Vermin Supreme.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V2lmkGFno1M