postposting posted:

A union walks into the movement. The steward says to the organizer, "We have really amazing class consciousness. You should represent us."

The agent says, "Sorry, I don't do union work. It's a little too petty-bourgeois."

The steward says, "Sir, if you just hear our line, we know you would want to represent us."

The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look."

The skilled workers form a semicircle around the amerikan flag and begin to sing the national anthem except every word is replaced with hitler. while continuing to sing, each in turn disrobes, grabs the flag, applies a liberal dose of lubricant from a barrel labeled OIL-DEATH, and rams up it up their own anus. This happens for a solid 15 minutes (they know all the verses, even the ones they don't teach you in school) until one worker expresses hesitation before the flagpole. He's immediately and brutally beaten to death and everyone takes turns urinating on the corpse.

After a brief squabble the body is stripped, cut, and portioned out into Crunchwrap Supreme™s. everyone lines up to pay the price at the surprisingly sophisticated counter. an automated kiosk tells each customer that it doesn't really matter what they do because they were too stupid and ugly to accomplish anything to begin with, and then asks for the skull of an east asian child to complete checkout.

after all the cannibalism and anal play, suddenly the workers begin to shit uncontrollably on the floor. first just a few, but then pretty soon all of them join in. this goes on for what seems for an impossibly long time until the shit is deep enough to be a real hazard. a sign goes up but still they start slipping and falling down all over, until each one is covered in shit. after awhile though it becomes clear that they're pratfalling on purpose, gleefully thrusting face first into the freshest shit they can find.

from around a corner, a procession of child slaves appears and begins shoveling away the shit (which is still piling up) as rapidly as they can. just as it appears that the level is starting the equalize, the workers begin to call the children racial slurs as a prelude to murdering them on a facebook live video that gets over 15k likes.

the shit now piles up unabated until it begins crushing and suffocating most of the people to death. the survivors drape a giant american flag over the still steaming shitruins and hold a conference on Design in the Digital Age.

For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of a perspective. What do you call it?"

And the foreman says, "The Labor Aristocrats!"

lmfao

EmanuelaBrolandi posted:

Tsinava I was just saying Austin is a terrible terrible place and I feel bad for everyone who lives there, especially not by choice. Nothing I was saying was "unmarxist" nor did I say anything about you moving or anything, that was all shit you extrapolated. Clearly it is a sensitive issue but don't make it out like I did anything but say Austin sucks and that it has become exceedingly expensive, which are facts. Anything else is yorself projecting I guess I'm sorry I hurt your feelings but tbh I didn't do anything so

thx. it is a shitty place.

tell everyone you know not to move there and to stay far away from it.


for future ref: saying "kill yourself if you live in _____" is kind of a vague criticism that may invite hostile responses, if your intent is to not hurt ppls feelings that is.

Edited by tsinava (May 22, 2016 20:53:10)

tears posted:

a giant fucking facebook thumbs up picture is just what these forums always needed, thanks

glad you like it, comrade

88888 posted:

that video is blocked in my country. i didn't even want to bully before, but now i'm out for blood

what country are you in, my friend? one of the below links will surely be accessible 4u. praise jesus