#681
Post rating: ~

cleanhands posted:

nofap july yall, that means no porn and no getting stinky w/yourself. get hype



that's what i'll be doing anyways but i can't say that i'd recommend it

#682
Goldgelbes Löwenäffchen
Post rating: ~

cleanhands posted:

nofap july yall, that means no porn and no getting stinky w/yourself. get hype


yeah i dont think so. im gonna jerk off twice as much, and im gonna do it to your posts

#683
[account deactivated]
#684
Post rating: ~
good for yall, im gonna rediscover my will to power and become a world renowned basketball lawyer and finger painter
#685
Post rating: ~
the person i'm talking about was a friend from high school btw, not the other person i was confused over earlier. i'm REALLY fucked in the head and all and having lots of problems adjusting with the meds.

Edited by dm ()

#686
Nippon
Post rating: ~
i thought cbass would never let me back in here

Edited by Goethestein ()

#687
[account deactivated]
#688
Post rating: ~
no it's just ranting because i can't guarantee that they are actually life problems and not just delusions. i'll stop talking about them either way

e:

like the being treated as less than human thing is true, but not by anyone here so that was pretty weird. i realized that i've probably been sort of feeding back on myself for a while and it's really awkward. it's time to put my mask back on and try playing normal again

Edited by dm ()

#689
Post rating: ~

tpaine posted:




THANK YOU! the situation is not threatening and it's safe to relax after all. sorry for being a really huge pain in the ass there for a while and ruining the forum. acknowledging this is making me feel better rather than humiliated/threatened. it is possible for things to improve. i do have control and thus responsibility. etc.

#690
tardy on these heaters
Post rating: +
you werent being a pain, we were just confused and a little concerned
#691
Post rating: ~
yeah, the kink stuff triggered flashbacks of that friend from the treatment center from my own point of view/memory. then i became convinced that she was posting here when something she said in a private message was just a coincidence at the same time the subject came up here. it turns out that i just didn't understand and she was really fine the whole time. she doesn't live in LA either, that's the friend from high school.

it got worse when i thought a bunch of people were in contact with one another going back and forth between here and facebook and started reading things into messages that weren't there (hypervigilance). it wasn't pretty and i understand why it freaked people out

Edited by dm ()

#692
Post rating: +
and i have no idea who empathy is or anyone else that posts on the forums. don't want to know because i hate facebook

Edited by dm ()

#693
Kurdt
Post rating: ~
im a wealthy new York jewess in hollywood
#694
drivel of drunken hags
Post rating: +
I had an enlivening discussion about the coming SCOTUS ruling over multiple Brooklyn Lagers at the South Street Seaport with my friend Dorkasaurus Rex last night
#695
Kurdt
Post rating: ~
i only drink He`Brew
#696
penitent
Post rating: ~
im so glad i dont have any of you fuckers on facebook
#697
penitent
Post rating: ~
except impper lol
#698
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

THANK YOU! the situation is not threatening and it's safe to relax after all.



oh, and not making me feel like shit from facebook or whatever is making its way onto the forums will help me maintain this. that's what was dangerous but i was confused about before. it's not something i have all that much control over yet because i'm used to the meds doing it for me rather than changing how i think about my surroundings and interpersonal relations and stuff.

being made delusional like that does make me feel pretty humiliated/threatened. acting on that basis makes it really easy to create that sort of feedback loop. i would hope that nobody here would do anything like that on purpose now that i've made it explicit. i know very well that i'm not particularly likeable when i'm confused and concerned and i tend to feel really guilty about stuff i do while confused and concerned. basically, it's a really good way to get me to kinda hate myself irrespective of the context since it pops up across them.

i'll leave it at that and hopefully we can get this place re-normalized

e: basically, how would you feel about being doomed to unintentionally recreate the circumstances of my upbringing? probably pretty broken and hopeless.

Edited by dm ()

#699
Post rating: ~

deadken posted:

im so glad i dont have any of you fuckers on facebook

add me lol

#700
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

dm posted:

THANK YOU! the situation is not threatening and it's safe to relax after all.

oh, and not making me feel like shit from facebook or whatever is making its way onto the forums will help me maintain this. that's what was dangerous but i was confused about before. it's not something i have all that much control over yet because i'm used to the meds doing it for me rather than changing how i think about my surroundings and interpersonal relations and stuff.

being made delusional like that does make me feel pretty humiliated/threatened. acting on that basis makes it really easy to create that sort of feedback loop. i would hope that nobody here would do anything like that on purpose now that i've made it explicit. i know very well that i'm not particularly likeable when i'm confused and concerned and i tend to feel really guilty about stuff i do while confused and concerned. basically, it's a really good way to get me to kinda hate myself irrespective of the context since it pops up across them.

i'll leave it at that and hopefully we can get this place re-normalized

add me lol

#701
Post rating: ~
i'd have to learn how to use it a lot better before considering that. it's really not a good idea.

i don't have anyone from here on my friends list or anything, though some people seem to think that they know my facebook account somehow.

Edited by dm ()

#702
tardy on these heaters
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

and i have no idea who empathy is or anyone else that posts on the forums. don't want to know because i hate facebook



im your accountant, i need you and your mom's credit card information stat. PM it to me, thx.

#703
tardy on these heaters
Post rating: ~

deadken posted:

im so glad i dont have any of you fuckers on facebook



add me i should be a mutual friend through impper

#704
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

some people seem to think that they know my facebook account somehow.



dm posted:



#705
Post rating: +

babyfinland posted:

dm posted:

and i have no idea who empathy is or anyone else that posts on the forums. don't want to know because i hate facebook

im your accountant, i need you and your mom's credit card information stat. PM it to me, thx.



you don't sound quite alright, i might have to show this post to a medical professional

#706
Post rating: ~
My goal here at Rhizzone is to eventually befriend Impper on facebook. But I do not have facebook so now I feel lost. so lost.
#707
Kurdt
Post rating: ~
john christ christy at facebook dot biz
#708
Post rating: ~
nevermind about that stuff with LA. more confusion.
#709
Post rating: ~
so just as a sort of thought experiment, who here sees me as this kind of guy?

Look at the industry’s biggest star, Jenna Jameson, who appears to control her business life. However in her book she reports that she was raped as a teenager and describes the ways in which men in her life pimped her. Her desperation for money also comes through when she tried to get a job as a stripper but looked too young — she went into a bathroom and pulled off her braces with pliers. She also describes drug abuse and laments the many friends in the industry she lost to drugs. And this is the woman said to have the most power in the pornography industry.

#710
[account deactivated]
#711
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

so just as a sort of thought experiment, who here sees me as this kind of guy?

Look at the industry’s biggest star, Jenna Jameson, who appears to control her business life. However in her book she reports that she was raped as a teenager and describes the ways in which men in her life pimped her. Her desperation for money also comes through when she tried to get a job as a stripper but looked too young — she went into a bathroom and pulled off her braces with pliers. She also describes drug abuse and laments the many friends in the industry she lost to drugs. And this is the woman said to have the most power in the pornography industry.



i don't buy it, what kind of strip club owner is going to tell any 18 year old she "looks too young"

#712
Post rating: ~
what if it was with that friend i had from the treatment center and it was her idea to help me get away from my family because she genuinely cared about me? what if it was what she genuinely wanted for herself and i had been being stubborn as hell about it and treating her like shit by not agreeing to do it? what if other jobs and college weren't open to us because we both have GEDs plus mental health discrimination.

why don't we debate it as a hypothetical right here?
#713
Post rating: ~
imagine proposing the idea to someone you really cared about and having them respond as if they didn't even know you? and having people say this about you all of the time when it was really the basis of a perfectly healthy relationship:

discipline posted:

people make a mistake in thinking that watching "amatuer" pornography is any better. you don't have a clear idea of the sourcing and iirc a lot of the women in those videos are trafficked, pressured into doing it for their husbands or boyfriends, etc



kinda dehumanizing imo.

discipline posted:

Cycloneboy posted:

This is pretty fucking weak, discipline. I could use the same argument to throw out all amateur media: maybe the people are trafficked, maybe they're pressured by family members.

ah yes, that other amateur media where women are choke slammed while getting fucked in the ass. six on one hand half dozen the other really



what about branding with disclaimers about proper BDSM practices to correct common misconceptions like this one?

Cycloneboy posted:

also, there are women who enjoy anal and/or being choked. FUCKED UP BUT TRUE.



what if

discipline posted:

Goethestein posted:

Amateur porn is sex trafficking lmao

I said you don't know where the pornography comes from or the conditions for consent in the video. it is pretty common knowledge that amateur pornography is certainly not 100% amateur. viral videos are also a thing. sometimes you can be viewing a funny video on youtube that actually had a 150k budget from coca cola. FU,BT.



dm posted:

k, so when a certain friend of mine was 16 and i was 18, she got put in a situation where she was very desperate and thought it best to offer herself to me sexually in exchange for shelter. i was not comfortable with this but tried to see about the shelter anyways and no luck b/c legal custody.

it was really damaging because i sort of saw the raw power right there even though i didn't exercise it and then i couldn't PROTECT her to boot. it turns out that she is now extremely insistent on being on the receiving end of exactly that same raw power and in fact defines her relationships exclusively in those terms. it had a weird deja vu feel to it.

NOW, she will not be in a relationship without it, even if the particular relationship isn't very healthy for her. otoh, i am about as safe as it gets for her and taking that role with her would be extremely protective and respectful from her point of view. she gets a lot of shit for it and has been hurt really badly over it in the past, so the same goes for me talking about her liking it being a way of defending her from her perspective.

it's hard to be a straight dude sometimes


#714
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

you don't sound quite alright, i might have to show this post to a medical professional



sorry, i meant

dm posted:

ok, so this really is going to take a while and some private discussion, but i'm going to write up a defense based on My Own Experience and apparently future plans



this thread should be a safe and non-threatening space for people to disagree and debate.

e: me and my thoughtful and loving kinda-sorta girlfriend (not empathy) are into watching porn with women being humiliated (tied down and having goat milkers used on them) together. don't kinkshame

Edited by dm ()

#715
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

babyfinland posted:

dm posted:

and i have no idea who empathy is or anyone else that posts on the forums. don't want to know because i hate facebook

im your accountant, i need you and your mom's credit card information stat. PM it to me, thx.

you don't sound quite alright, i might have to show this post to a medical professional

im your doctor, this guy sounds legit stop being a pussy

#716
Post rating: ~

dm posted:

dm posted:

you don't sound quite alright, i might have to show this post to a medical professional

sorry, i meant

dm posted:

ok, so this really is going to take a while and some private discussion, but i'm going to write up a defense based on My Own Experience and apparently future plans



this thread should be a safe and non-threatening space for people to disagree and debate.

e: me and my thoughtful and loving kinda-sorta girlfriend (not empathy) are into watching porn with women being humiliated (tied down and having goat milkers used on them) together. don't kinkshame

its about being sure that you and your ksgf arent witnesses to an act of violence, beyond that its nobodys business really

#717
Post rating: ~
yeah it was a joke again like the transvestite thing earlier. i would feel pretty threatened if i felt like people were talking about what i was really into and sort of made it their business or something like that

Edited by dm ()

#718
Post rating: ~
and for The Record, i'm really going to be getting a job at a bookstore for the time being, though i did briefly consider the above and felt really weird about it.
#719
Post rating: ~
bookstores are lame but i guess there arent any public libraries anymore
#720
Mike Nelson here.
Post rating: ~
toronto's public library system is so bad for academic stuff, whatever they have is all housed in their reference library so you can't take it out. and the university library here costs $250 a year to join. which still works out as worthwhile if you read a lot of dumb junk like i do but still. i tried to get them to give me a low-income discount based on the premise that they offer a big senior's discount and the entire reason for a senior's discount is that senior's tend to be lower/fixed income. no dice.