#1
What made me decide to travel was my first tattoo. On me ankles, Live Free. I decided, oh man, I worked for my dad. I don't know where the fuck I'm going with this. Just to live free. Live your life. Do some fun before you get old and you can't do anything else. Except for raise your family and do your job and do what you need for your family. If you're young enough, do it and live free. I'm free as a bird. Live free assholes. Stop worrying about your life. And give those needy mother fuckers, not me, but him and him and him and keep partying. PTK all day to the day we die. We rolling through your streets with a cardboard sign and a box of wine. Maybe if I was on a scholarship I'd have more to say. I gotta smoke some pot so gimme a blunt please. Send it my way.

Greyson



"My leash was around my wrist but my dog wasn't attached to my god damn leash."
Yesterday fucking morning I woke up. Me and my boyfriend woke up. We were sleeping on 5th. Where was it 5th and A? My leash was around my wrist but my dog wasn't attached to my god damn leash. And fucking found out she was fucking gone. And then my boyfriend's supposed to get me a bag of heroin and then I went to sleep because I was all pissed off about my dog. Then I wake up and he's like, "Baby I lost a bag of heroin." And I'm like, "God damn it.You lost. Ok you lost it mother fucker, yeah you lost it." He's wasted. So I go back to sleep. I wake up and "Jahni your boyfriends getting arrested."

Jahni



"I have no desire to do anything ever."
I hit the road when i was seventeen, after a book I read called Evasion. It really inspired me to go on the road and see what's out there. I was hooked on the free life, living on the road. Meeting new people. Exploring new places. After that its been kinda non stop of west coast to east coast, east coast to west coast.


What a lot of us are out here doing. Just living the free life. Dumpster diving. Getting around for free. You don't need to work because there's so much excess that people have, they don't need that, they try to dispose of or do dispose of, that you can take and make your own. I have no desire to do anything ever. I'm completely content doing nothing and living off the excess of other people.


T-Bird



"The entire life, the universe and everything is the answer of forty two."
I'm forty two. Forty two. The answer to life , the universe is forty two. I am the answer to life, the universe and everything. Forty two. There's nothing I can give you other then forty two. It's not the question it's the answer man. That's like forty two. The question is such a contradictory like ever loving statement that if the answer were to be there with the question they would contradict each other and um wipe each other out of existence. The entire life, the universe and everything is the answer of forty two. Yeah no like five million years of human evolution equals forty two. Yeah like forty two. I'm not a human being. I'm a man with an answer.

Daniel



http://crustypunks.blogspot.com/
#2
Lifestyle lumpenproles who only have their ‘freedom’ because of superprofits extracted from the third world proletariat
#3
Recently we've been running kinda running across a lot of fuckups. A lot of people with wheels and then they end up fucking us over. So we get a ride from Seattle all the way to Missoula. People don't want us to ride in their van. All right cool, whatever. I don't mind it. We'll make our own. Get a lot of shitty rides from fucking people from Montana on down to South Dakota. South Dakota, different fucking story. Fucking God damn bunch of stupid ass fucking prairie niggers. Fucking hate those fuckers, I don't like Crow Indians. They tried to solicit my wife and tried to take us out in the middle of nowhere. Ended up beating the fuck out of this guy and stealing his truck. Left the truck on the side of the highway but I dunno.


Rob

#4
Body of a Boy!
Mind of a Monster!
Soul of an Unearthly Thing!


I WAS A TEENAGE LUMPENPROLE
#5
On the way to the beer store to get a beer. Hanging out in the park with my friends. Passing through New York for awhile. I'm pretty spontaneous. Like to travel. Freight trains of course. Where else, Greyhound? I like going through the Canadian Rockies on the trains. Like actually being on a freight train out in the middle of nowhere. Seeing bears.

I used to live in SanFrancisco. Used to be this dude who used to buy my socks. I dunno he liked really smelly dirty feet. I thought that was really pretty freaky. I'm pretty freaky, out there on wild things, but he takes the cake. He would like smell them and stuff.

I don't like stores here in Manhattan. Their just like way too expensive. Like just a beer. Three bucks for a forty, that's ridiculous. Usually no more then like two fifty at the most. I say fifty cents matters for sure. I like other stuff, the Four Loko cause it's a little bit higher alcohol percentage. Its got caffeine in it. It keeps you up and gets you a good little buzz on. It's like an actual like super good drink. But it only like appeals to like I imagine poverty stricken people of our nation.

I mostly have a routine. I like panhandle out in Queens to make money. Then go do what I do. Then I go to sleep in Brooklyn. So I just kinda like bypass Manhattan. I'd rather be kicking it here everyday. It's just like everyday I forced to make money to do the things that I do. Anywhere from like a hundred and five to a hundred and thirty five. Sometimes it's like good right here in midtown, but it's just the cops are such fucking assholes. They'll take you to jail for unlawful soliciting. Different little technical rules. Things that should just be like a ticket, they'll take you to actual jail. You know what I mean? Central bookings.

They either love them or hate them. They think I'm brave. This or that. And then you have those people that are redneck. "What are you trying to make yourself black?" Or "that's real stupid." "Why would anybody want to do that?" Or think it's satanic or something. You know everybody's different. It's kinda like asshole repellant. It keeps away all the assholes and it just attracts good people. I'm used to the stares now. Is that real everyday or did that hurt? The same questions everyday.

Jason



#6


listen to this instead
#7
#8
[account deactivated]
#9
#10
this thread is now about yacht rock
#11
#12


best episode
#13
#14
[account deactivated]
#15
[account deactivated]
#16
i'm all of these people and more-- check out my blog on the ideal of a post-racial society that also includes videos of me reviewing different gravity bong methods
#17
who was the poster who got rly defensive about his crustpunk gf
#18
that was Me. i have a crust punk girlfirend
#19
ALBERT EINSTEIN: Oh, my science is nothing. We must discuss your plays. I have so many favorites: The Hamlet; Romeo Man; McDonalds; King Guys ... (kissing his fingers abrasively] The writing! The characters! The meter! Magnifique! How do you do such meter?

WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE: Meter is no problem at all. The secret to meter is to do this thing all the time: [he rolls up his sleeve and makes an awkward slight jerking motion with his left arm). This is how I keep my meter. [amidst continued arrhythmic movements) That's how it's done.

[Einstein, watching the bard intently, begins imitating his strange forearm motion)

WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE: That's how it's done. I could fancy a verse right now. [with rising pitches on each syllable) An ode to the season of ice! [in an exalted tone, while motioning strangely)

"Contumelies and dreams lay splintered:
Wear my cool shorts all through winter.
Walk along, the lakes lay frozen,
Wrestling isn't fake-- I'll show them,
All my moves, in shorts ever limber,
Doing wrestles all through winter.
Throughout these blizzards, I shall
not hide;
Break on through to the other side."

Thank you.

[Throughout all of this, Einstein clumsily imitates Shakespeare's stupid arm movements. The playwright is not gay or bisexual.)
#20
i wish i had a crustpunk gf
#21

Makeshift_Swahili posted:

i wish i had a crustpunk gf

if you will it it is no dream

#22
What can I say? I suddenly feel like dating a nice, old fashioned, Chicago trixie.

I'm talking about a clear-skinned, midwestern, size three, C-cup beauty with a thing for Amstel Light and nice straight teeth. She has a bachelors in something innocuous and irons her shirts before work.

She likes pretty shoes and designer jeans. She lives in a condo and never makes eye contact with anyone during those loathsome trips on the El (well, when she's not driving her Acura or Volkswagon to DSW). She's a shameless flirt at rooftop barbecues and owns at least or two pieces of jewelry from Tiffany's.

And so what? I'm tired of dating tattooed chicks with a thing for ironic clothes who work at shitty bars and spend Tuesday night bowling. I'm sick of hearing about the latest indy band and meeting their dopey, stoned friends who also happen to be in lame indy bands.

Fuck that. Fuck the ironic t-shirts and crappy underwear. I'm after a sweet, innocent trixie who's heart isn't black and who was more than $13.79 in her checking account. She's got some stellar lingerie and a healthy "slut in the bedroom" mentality that nobody would ever suspect at her work.

I'm all the fuck-up our relationship will ever need. I'm the bad boy. The artist. The eternal, hopeless intellect with the drinking hobby who inevitably stays out too late on weekdays. I'm the one who'll forget to call, but will make for it up by bringing you a wonderfully creative assortment of flowers that I scavenged from the ally behind the local florist.

I could be a fuck-wit chad but I disdain that type. You could date a fuckwit chad but you're sick and tired of passionless evenings, his boring friends, the same old shit, the lack of creativity, and his boring fat ass.

You'll like me because I have my masters degree and a creative career, yet I prefer cheap beer. I come from an affluent town on the east coast but I prefer my cruddy apartment in a not-so-exciting part of Chicago. I'm athletic, in great shape and well built, but I think softball teams are for pussies.

I write. I paint. I can fix your fucked-up shower door. I can change your oil. I can kill your spiders. But I'll never wear one of those goddamn striped shirts or wear a backwards baseball hat. I won't discuss Cubs stats. I won't watch most TV. And I've never seen any of the sequels to American Pie. I might get a second tattoo or get certified in welding just for fun. My folks are still married. My sisters have kids and husbands and live in the suburbs. My background probably isn't much different from yours.

But I've always chosen the "fuck you" Lincoln Park, Fuck you Starbucks, fuck you Crate and Barrel point of view, and decidedly spent my time at dive bars, with rough people, seeking the sureal experiences, living beneath my means, getting dirt beneath my fingernails, dating people I shouldn't, and living life as it should be–fully examined–but I've never given you trixies a chance.

Until now. So allow me to introduce myself.

I want to be the bad boy. I want you to be the good girl. Your girlfriends with their crappy boyfriends will secretly envy you. Their crappy boyfriends will secretly fear me. Our chemistry will sizzle as our opposite stations ignite a firestorm of passion, roaringly good sex, thoroughly interesting conversation, endless possibilities, long nights out or ass-kicking Scrabble games, and the potential for something long, smart and hot.

I'm 5'10, great blue eyes, naturally straight teeth, with a penchant for writing too much.

So there you go. Your smart, well-educated, terminally dissatisfied, open-minded, rough around the edges, good hearted guy is waiting for you...and you're his classic, midwestern, upper-middle class beauty who's ready to take a chance. Send a picture. Or don't. I'm not sure how it works with you trixies.

But I can't wait to find out.

Location: Wicker Park
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
#23
someday gyrofry, someday...
#24
that guy says he has "naturally straight teeth". are there women who hate a history of orthodontics. like yeah i was dating eric but then i found out he had braces when he was fourteen and it sort of killed it for me.
#25
you have to come from a wealthy or middle class background to get orthodontia unless you live in canada or some other totally backward reformist trot state
#26
I was on a Greyhound bus. I was going from Boise, Idaho to Portland, Oregon. I seen the fattest chick ever. So fucking disgusting dude. Anyway the whole family was fat. This lady was Mexican or something like that. She had like six Mexican kids. Two were boys and four were girls and they were all fat. They were one big fat fucking family. Mexican family. This lady was so fucking fat. I don't know if you've ever seen this but when they have an extremely large fat person on the Greyhound they have to take off part of the side of the bus. And then there's this hydraulic shit that comes out, you know what I mean. Like a platform. Dude they had to have like the fire department there. You know like EMS, an ambulance there and shit to supervise this shit. So we had to have a different lunch break. We had to eat the shit from the Greyhound station in case anything happened. Anyway so they hydraulic her ass fucking down and shit and dude she obviously cannot fit inside a regular size vehicle right so she had one of those big fat person Amigos and shit like that. Looked like a zero turn fucking lawn mower. Anyway they wheel her down. I was like, "no way. No fucking way." This big van pulled up with a trailer hitch at the back of it. And dude she didn't get in the van. She wheeled that zero turn shit to the back of the trailer hitch bro and they drove away. Oh God. It was the most fattest thing I've ever seen in my life. Fattest, disgusting, fucking shit. Wind blowing through her fat shit, Mexican mullet, you know what I mean. I bet she weighed close to a thousand pounds. She was like a big circus freak.

#27

gyrofry posted:

you have to come from a wealthy or middle class background to get orthodontia unless you live in canada or some other totally backward reformist trot state

canada doesn't publicly insure dental care either really. one of the secondary reasons i might go back to school is to get dental insurance to get my teeth fixed.

#28
fringus needs braces
#29
naw i dunno if this is a TMI thing but it's more because when you're so out of it that you don't change your clothes for weeks it's not like you're on top of dental hygiene so i ended up with a bunch of cavities and shit inherited from that period of my life. crustpunk donald.
#30
#31
a credit to hippies and juggalos everywhere
#32
these guys are probably as independent of third-world derived superprofits as anyone can be while still living in a developed country. although if the theory here is that you can't do anything about the blood of browns that breastfeeds you so you should probably just do what makes your parents and family happy while avoiding looking like a fucking disgusting loser freak, then whatever
#33
I'm getting high. Living here. Yeah I'm here getting high. I've been living here since 2004, 2003. I'm born and raised in Manhattan. I dunno. I'm a heroin addict. I just get high all day and drink and live to get high. That's pretty much what I do. Actually I don't know what I'm doing. It's ridiculous. This life is shit. Not here. Look at me man. I haven't showered in a week. I beg for money all day. All my friends get high. I don't talk to my family anymore. At all. I'm twenty three and it's been like nine, ten years since I've spoken to any of them. My life is going to shit. Slowly and it always happens when I come back here. I went to prison. I came back and I went straight here. And it's just a circle of shit.

I probably should be in school doing something productive. Yeah I don't have a lot of time left. I've just been doing this for so long it's not cute anymore you know. It's like a waste of time at this point. The same thing happens every day in this life. It's risky. Im on parole. I'm on the run. I'm on the run hanging out in this park. There's a warrant squad coming through here all the time. So I should probably be doing something else. Like school. I'm an artist. I'd like to go to school one day. I have to get clean first. That's a problem. I just don't know how clean I want to be. I just love getting high. Well I need to get high not because I'm just at the point where if I don't get high I get sick. It started out as love. I used to love to get high. Now it's a job. It's a full time job. I gotta shoot like two bundles a day. And it's like I'm not even enjoying it.

This is it probably. I guess I don't even know where to start. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I can make it any other way. I don't know if I can be happy any other way. Or maybe this is it. This is where I'm most happy. I've lived so many different lifestyles and getting high is the only thing that's like really, you know like it's worked for me. Even though it's like pushed everybody and everything away from me. I just feel like it's the only thing that's ever worked for me.

No. How many people are happy? How many people can really say they're happy. I mean I'm happy at times. But overall I'm not the happiest person. No. I'm not trying to sound desperate. Maybe a little bit. I'm not happy really anywhere. When I was in prison and when I was clean, I was not happy. I just wanted to get high all the time. When I go to rehab I'm not happy. I need like. I dunno, I guess I'm like um. I don't know. I don't even know what it is man. I wanna figure it out. But I just can't.
#34
you people are all garbage but lol congrats we found the only members of western society who are on a rung low enough for a bunch of college kids, yuppies, and Goatstein to laugh at
#35

kinch posted:

#36

EmanuelaOrlandi posted:

you people are all garbage but lol congrats we found the only members of western society who are on a rung low enough for a bunch of college kids, yuppies, and Goatstein to laugh at



i like to laugh. laughing here. yeah, i'm here laughing. i dunno. i just like to laugh all day. that's pretty much what i do. actually i don't know what i'm doing.

#37
a libertarian (involved in some NGO charity) got really mad at me because i said crust punks have every right to outcompete hobos for people's pocketchange. free market biotch

Edited by Chthonic_Goat_666 ()

#38
lol
#39

EmanuelaOrlandi posted:

you people are all garbage but lol congrats we found the only members of western society who are on a rung low enough for a bunch of college kids, yuppies, and Goatstein to laugh at

nice. these faux-leftists should think twice before picking on us punks.

#40
PUNKS FUCK OF